Letter to My 20-year-old Self

So I was listening to NPR this afternoon and they interviewed a girl that asked a lot of women to write a letter to their 20-year-old selves. Words of advice, reflection whatever and it was interesting to say the least. So I thought that maybe I should do the same.

Dear 20-year-old Me,

First of all, the guy you are dating is gay. Gay, gay, gay, gay, gay. You won’t discover this for another year or so but start planning your life accordingly because he isn’t going to marry you. (and in the long run this whole experience is pivotal in your growth into adulthood but it still sucks while it all happens.)

Secondly, quit obsessing about your weight. You are awesome the way you are and this almost thirty-five year old you has about fifty or so pounds to lose to even get close to where you are. I am also pretty sure that if I/you were ever happy with a weigh that I/you were at any point, it would have been a lot easier to maintain. Being a woman is hard and you are going to run into senseless stuff like this all of the time. Just try to navigate around it the best you can.

Tertiary (look up this word now, you will have an opportunity later to impress your boss with knowing its meaning), go to graduate school like I did. It really helps you grow (up and (sadly) out). But really research your job. The one I had was good for a while but there wasn’t any growth and I got bored and sad. Go ahead and return that call from Tyson in a few years even though you are hurt by them and have already signed with someone else.

That’s it for now. You’ll have a pretty great life and most of it I wouldn’t change but there are some bumps in the road that wouldn’t hurt to avoid. Good Luck and I’m sure I’ll talk to you later.

Toodles,

The Almost 35-year-old you

P.S. Make sure you got to volleyball with the Catholic Singles group and pay special attention to the Maytag man. It will be worth your while. |:)

Accessories

So I just caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror and there it was. I'm not sure how long it's been there but I can narrow it down to between sometime after 10:00 when I got home from the gym and now. The question is - was it there when we went to the grocery store around 11:30? Hmmmm. Come to think of it, some guy coming into the store walking straight at us said to his companion “Now I’ve see everything.” Didn’t think much about it at the time . . . crap . . .

So it seems I wore the bright lavender with white polka dots bow in my hair to the store today.

Too bad it didn’t at least match my outfit.

Writer's Block

So I keep thinking I need to write more here. Yes, if you have read this at all you are thinking - "Duh, you don't rarely write here, but you are so funny and relevant." Ha ha okay so you might be thinking some version of that. But anywho, throughout the day I have all these funny things that I think I need to write about and formulate in my head but when I finally have a chance to write it down, I can't remember a damn thing. Not even a subject, let alone the hilarious content I had worked out. So what to do. I keep thinking I should write down the subject or something and get back to it but alas it hasn't happened. Well we shall see. Hopefully I can start remembering because I crack myself up all the time and I would like to share and get it on paper, er, or virtual paper as a blog seems to be. Wish me luck or send some of that memory herb - if I could remember what it is I would have put that down - would have been funnier.